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No, She Doesn’t Want to See Your Dick
When you’re in the world of polyamory for a handful of years and spend time on various forums, you start to see the same conversations over and over. Hard topics hashed out with no clear winners. One of the debates I see pretty consistently starts with a post like this: This triggers a back and […]
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Why I’m Not Down With The OPP
I’m not talking about the same OPP from the 90’s song by Naughty by Nature. I’m talking about something different. It’s something that plagues the polyamory community and is widely seen as unethical. The OPP I’m not down with is the One Penis Policy. If you want to see how this policy can cause problems […]
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How Polyamory Fixed my Fear of Commitment
You may be wondering why there’s a picture of rocking chairs from Cracker Barrel. I’ll get there so you can understand why. But first, we need to start 15 years ago. It was 2005, I was 21 years old and was engaged to the woman of my dreams. I was so excited, but despite my […]
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3 Invasive Species in the Relationship Ecosystem
Do you remember in grade school when your science teacher told you to think of human cells like little cities? City walls, city streets, recycling plants and all that fun stuff. Ever since then I would make all kinds of comparisons to better organize and understand things. It doesn’t even surprise me a little bit […]
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The Jealousy Mind Flayer
Someone shared this with you – likely because they know you are struggling with jealousy in your journey of polyamory. They want you to know that they understand what it’s like to feel insecure. They know it’s hard to think about your partner with another person – even if it’s just spending time away with […]
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Polyamory Tool Belt – 4×4 Yes Test
Here is a simple 4×4 Yes Test. Four simple rules and four simple questions. You’re not done with the test until you can answer yes to the 4 questions. If you’re checking in with your partner(s) regularly, the whole thing should take less than 10 minutes. This test leverages the power of good communication and […]
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Walls – My Hidden Toxic Trait
Before polyamory, I was a serial monogamist and had been in a few long term relationships starting from when I was 17. If you exclude all my middle school and high school relationships (can we even REALLY call them all relationships?) then I have not dated much at all as an adult. In a lot […]
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The Confusing World of Hierarchy
I’m going to be talking about hierarchy a lot in this article. It’s a tricky topic so before I start, let’s start with the definition: What is hierarchy? Hierarchy – a system or organization in which people or groups are ranked one above the other according to status or authority. Is this something that happens […]
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The Polyamory Rule Book
I’ve spent countless hours working on this. When I started my journey I had always wished there was a rule book for polyamory. Monogamy seems to have pretty clearly defined rules, why can’t polyamory? Well here it is. Finally. A rule book for polyamory: Rule #1: Treat the people you care about with basic human […]
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Hello From The Other Side
TW ~ Emotional/Mental Abuse Wait? The other side of what? What does that even mean? Well, I’m not dead and this isn’t a pop song or a Netflix original series. This is real life. We are all on the other side of something, right? You might be on the other side of college, cancer or […]
Relationship Coaching ~ Blog ~ Merch